Worlds Apart

Today I think brought me one of my biggest culture shocks since being in South Africa.  When I was on training on Coll they talk about ‘culture shock within the first 4/8 weeks’.  So I never expected it to come this late on in the year.

It started off when a little boy aged 5 was admitted into Bethany.  Admissions are very regular recently so this was just another day and excitement of getting a new child who we get to know and bond with.  However this admission had very different circumstances.  I walked past the social workers office and I saw a young lady hysterically crying and holding her head in her hands.  Not thinking too much of it, I walked down to pre-school to meet the new little boy who was so bubbly and full of energy.  All the other children were crowding around him and to be honest, it looked like he loved the attention.  Then the pre-school teacher, Tandogaz, pulled me to one side and showed me a beautiful hand made card with Xhosa writing on the inside.  I smiled and said it was beautiful thinking it was what a child had made for her and asked her to translate what was written.  What she said next was truly heartbreaking and brought me to tears.  The card read:

“*The new child’s name*… I am so sorry that I have had to do this and please know that I will miss you with all my heart and soul.  Please never forget me, I love you. Mummy”

I pieced together that the lady crying in the office was the mother of the little boy who had just been brought in.  I’m not sure why she had to give up her precious little boy, but it’s highly likely that he will not see his mother again in the near future.  And very soon, he’s going to ask why his Mummy isn’t around anymore.  If this is due to lack of money to feed and cloth him and general poverty then my heart breaks even further.  Knowing there are people in the UK living off benefits unnecessarily or a man willing to burn down his own house with his children inside so he can get more money off the government makes me sick.  The corruption in the South African government means that people in desperate poverty are not getting the finical support they need… all because of greed. 

Today has made me realise more than ever how extremely lucky I am to have such an amazing and loving family who would do anything for me.  I also feel guilty that in 4 months I will be going home to luxury that most around this area can only dream of.  However I’m coming to believe that most things in life is a gift that we have to learn not to take for granted, because if one day we don’t have it… how would we cope?

Where is the time going?!

When I started out this year I vowed to myself I would write a blog REGULARLY to ensure I could keep everyone at home updated.  I’ve just been so busy around Bethany I rarely get a chance to sit and write one… or I’m just lazy, I’ll let you decide that one…

So the start of 2013 has been a good one for Bethany Home.  The house nurse ran a hygiene workshop for all the mothers to improve standards and so far the improvements are showing.  Bethany has been lucky enough to receive very generous financial donations which is a blessing as at the end of 2012 we received the bad news at the that the government were significantly decreasing their funding towards care homes across South Africa.  Many of our children have been discharged to either other more suitable care homes or in the most ideal cases, back to their families.  Although it’s incredibly sad to see them go – many tears have been shed – knowing the move will benefit them and their needs is the saving grace.  Also it means there are fewer children in Bethany (currently 58 but it can change on a weekly basis) and resources are not so stretched.  Especially food… if there is one thing I’ve learnt, it’s that children can EAT.

Summer arrived slightly later than scheduled in Mthatha!  So although we are currently meant to be in Autumn, the heat is incredible and the African sun is really as hot as they say!  The girls are I take full advantage of the weather and ensure that each child gets to go out on regular walks around the compound.  They can’t get enough of them, they love being in the outdoors and away from Bethany, it gives them a chance to run free and momentarily forget that they live in a children’s home and the fact that they often have to fight amongst one an other for attention.  That’s what is great about being a volunteer, our job is to fill in the gaps which often the mothers are too busy – or lazy – to do.  Loving each and every child unconditionally brings me such joy.  Although at times I ask myself “Am I doing enough? What else could I do?”  But I believe Bethany Home would be a very different place without the volunteers and I know each child loves me unconditionally, even if I don’t get it right all the time!

The girls and I are getting more involved in the pre-school and have helped develop ‘weekly themes’ which range from fruit and veg to numbers and simple sums.  Our job is to take children out in small groups and make A3 sized posters with them and do lots of colouring and painting.  We talk about the item we are drawing – I say ‘talking’, my limited Xhosa and their limited English, it can be a struggle! – I just get them to repeat the name of the item and well done for colouring so beautifully.  I also spend a lot of my time in the Nursery and Day Room.  Communication is a lot easier there, they cry when they are hungry/ dirty and smile when they are happy… simples.  But it’s great to play with all the little babies and toddlers.  Danielle’s partners kindly brought the Day Room a stereo that we play loads of music and dance.  African people are born with rhythm, I know it sounds ridiculous but believe me its true.  My children as young as 18 months already know how to move their bodies in time with the music, it is incredible!  But I most certainly do the best gangnam style dance, really just asks anyone on Long Street in Cape Town!

Since arriving in South Africa my immune system seems to have escaped me and having a holiday of its own.  Unfortunately last month I developed acute bronchitis and sinusitis and had to be transferred and admitted into a Durban hospital because specialist care is lacking in Mthatha.  It was a scary time and one where I just wanted my family around me to look after me and cheer me up, but what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger hey? I don’t think my chest would agree with that last bit, if so much as look at a hill and I’m puffing on my inhaler!!

So I’m over half way through my year and I’ve got so much to look forward too, but I also realise how little time I have left.  It scares me and makes me sad but I know I have to make every minute count from now on to ensure I get the best out of this incredible experience I’m lucky enough to be doing.  Within a matter of weeks my Dad and Stepmother will be here to whisk me away to a luxury safari lodge and visit Bethany! Beginning of May my Mum and sister will arrive where we will head for Chinsta to spend time on the beach then two nights in a game reserve, also ensuring time to spend in Bethany.  Karin will be staying 5 days longer to help around Bethany and see the work I do, then we will head to Coffee Bay for 2 days so I can spend some quality time with my sis!!!  Going 8 months without seeing my family has been tough but it’s not long now.  Then in June one of my bestest buddies is coming for 2 weeks!!! Emma Robertson… I cannot wait.  These two weeks we will hit the road and travel around SA and do lots of crazy things.

So I think that is about is from this side of the world.  Post has hit a bit of a dry spell so please send letters, they really do brighten my day: Bethany Home, PO Box 25, Vulindlela Heights, Mthatha 5143, South Africa.

Much love to you all and thanks for being patient with me updating my blog!!xxx

CAPE TOWN

Written on 27/01/2013

So the day finally arrived, we were heading for Cape Town to carry on the long-standing tradition of Project Trust volunteers gathering in Cape Town for the festive period.  Our rucksacks full to the brim – heavier than when I arrived in South Africa!! – we boarded the 19 hour coach journey.  It’s fair to say we were more than excited!  After 19 long hours we arrived in Cape Town on Christmas Eve, tired, smelly but eager to freshen up and see all the other volunteers.  It has to be said, that first night out was one of the best I’ve ever had.  A group of 35 Project Trust volunteers hit Long Street, it was insane!

The next morning I woke up a little worse for wear and totally forgot it was CHRISTMAS DAY.  Apparently the Santa hat on my head wasn’t a clear enough clue either.  A tradition of Long Street Backpackers was that every Christmas day, they climb up Table Mountain to a cave where they eat lots, play loud music and of course, drink.  Everyone was allocated a platter of food to carry up the mountain, I was given the marshmallow rice crisy desert… SCORE!  On the way up we got terribly lost and I was hungry, so I did what anyone would do, ate half of the desert.  I wasn’t the most popular person when we finally arrived!  The views were stunning from the cave, it overlooked the whole of Cape Town and we could see for miles to the surrounding mountains.  Although it didn’t feel like a traditional Christmas I was certainly in the festive sprits.  Singing Christmas songs, eating turkey and stuffing and having one too many champagnes.  Later that day I had a lovely Skype session with my beautiful family; whom I think had also had one too many champagnes!  It was so good to see them so happy and slightly merry too!  I can’t lie, a tear was shed.  I missed them a lot on Christmas Day, but I couldn’t have asked for a better group of people to celebrate it with.  Plus, how many people can say they spent Christmas day in 35-degree heat in a cave, up Table Mountain? Once in a lifetime.

Cape Town was eventful to say the least.   For example, Daisy cutting her foot open on a broken Black Label bottle.  But it was ok, Nurse Sally was there to save the day.  In the middle of a packed club I bandaged her foot up and blagged two sympathy shots for us.  If someone offers you ‘Stroh Rum’ shot… NEVER do it!  Two words: 80% Alcohol…

One morning I was woke up with a slightly sore head – well actually this happened every morning, even when I hadn’t been drinking the night before? – and Lucy says ‘fancy hiking Table Mountain today?’  I figure why not, won’t get the opportunity to do it any time soon.  I regretted that decision as soon as I took the first step.  Also I don’t know what possessed me to do it with two Outward Bound girls who were incredibly fit, I mean I like to think I’m quite fit, but compared to them I may aswell have been morbidly obese and smoked 40 a day!!  This is no exaggeration, I nearly died!!! Two hours and many water breaks later we reached the top.  It was the best feeling in the world. I did it. I conquered Table Mountain!

There’s only one-way to describe New Years Eve on Long Street: CRAZY.  They close off the road and it turns into one big street party (Videos on Youtube, check them out). All the volunteers decided to take Long Street by force.  But not before we played ‘Never Have I Ever In South Africa’… some interesting stories came out of that game!!  Anyway we headed out to our favourite spot ‘Bobs Bar’ which was so good.  It was such a great feeling to enter the new year surrounded some of the best people!! Best New Year’s to date.  At about 3am I did what any other drunk person does, head to McDonalds of course.  ‘Start as you mean to go on’ ay?!

Overall the week in Cape Town was unforgettable – well the bits I can remember anyway ;) – and I couldn’t have spent it with a better group of people.  Also meeting the volunteers from Botswana and Swaziland and getting to know them too was so lovely.

P.s. if you ever go to Long Street… make sure you check out Bob’s Bar! Free shots for everyone who dances on the pole.  Us girls didn’t need to buy many drinks!!

Do They Know It’s Christmas Time At All?

Written on 27/01/2013

So Christmas has come and gone in Africa in the blink of an eye!  As I lye here and think about December, I have to say it’s probably one of the best to date.  There’s so much to say so I’ll just say the highlights:

‘Christmas Day’ at Bethany

We had the Christmas party at Bethany on 21^st.  In the early hours of the morning the girls and I all dressed up as Santa Claus, sneaked into the kids dorms and put presents on the end of their beds.  A few woke up and the look on their faces when they thought Santa had come was the cutest thing ever.  Although one of the older boys, Apile, said ‘Enkosi (thank you) Sally’ as I handed him a present.  I thought I was quite a believable Santa!! Turns out kids aren’t as naïve as I thought.  The next morning I was awoken by lots of laughing and joyful screams.  I walked out of the flat to the courtyard to find all the kids playing with their new toys and treasuring them.  I did nearly cry at this point because it was so beautiful to see them all so happy and the thought that I helped contribute to that made it extra special.  After lots of fun and games that day, the ‘real Santa’ came to visit Bethany.  He turned up in a fire truck (turns out the usual sleigh that he uses was ‘out of order’, oh well, I guess a fire truck is close enough… sort of?! Well it’s red.)  Santa brought each child a rucksack full of little toys and sweeties, which the kids adored. 

Then came the much awaited ‘Christmas Dinner’.  I have to say when I walked into the kitchen and didn’t see a turkey in sight I was slightly disappointed, but hey, fried chicken is the next best thing right?!!  It was a real treat for the kids to get deep fried chicken, roast potato’s, mashed butternut and chocolate cake.  It was also a nice change from Pap for us girls.J After the kids went to bed, all the staff came together for a Braai.  SO MUCH FOOD.  But its rude in the Xhosa culture to turn down food so I powered through and finished off that dinner too.  That was my Cape Town diet out the window; I was surprised I didn’t chunder everywarrr! 

So I guess this day brings me back to the title of this blog, ‘Do They Know It’s Christmas Time At All?’  A famous question once asked by Band Aid and people have questioned it ever since.  Well guys, no need to fret anymore, I can confirm that they certainly DO know it’s Christmas time.  We made sure of that at Bethany Home.

“Christmas time… Mistletoe & Wine”

Written on 02/112/2012

So I have reached the 3 month mark… ¼ of the way through my year away.  Life at Bethany is very much routine, some days it can be a little boring but I don’t think I could handle drama everyday!  However there has been drama obviously… The bunk bed broke, Lisa jumped on the top and SNAP… you can imagine what happened next! Oh and our flat flooded.  I don’t mean a little water got on the floor, I mean my feet were immersed in water.  We had to rip the carpet up, my mattress was waterlogged and the dampness started to set in.  The smell was horrendous.  A trip to town and R200 later, we were armed with scented candles, scented sticks and air fresheners.

So what’s new here? Well we’re all busy getting ready for Christmas! We are currently putting up the decoration around the home and starting to organise the Christmas party we are going to have on 22^nd.  The three of us won’t be here on actual Christmas day but we still wanted to celebrate with the kids, so Christmas day has been changed (they’ll never know!!).  We’re going to dress up like Santa on the night of the 21^st and put little presents on the end of each of their beds for them to wake up to.  It’s going to be odd doing this, as for the past 18 years of my life I’ve always had this done for me (yes that’s right, I still had a stocking at the age of 18, not ashamed of it!!)  Although I still may put my stocking out and hope that Santa comes, if he doesn’t… well then I know my whole childhood was a lie!!  Mum was really cute and sent the three of us advent calendars!  Possibly the best surprise ever J and Christmas parcels are on there way from family.  So even though I won’t be with my family at Christmas, I know they’re thinking of me. 

We had a new arrival at Bethany, she’s two months old and weights about the same as a bag of sugar and fits on my forearm.  When she first arrived I thought she was old days old.  She was abandoned at Nelson Mandela hospital after being very premature and very ill.  I know it sounds awful but she is so underweight that her eyes are too big for her face and look like they are about to pop out.  However she’s making really good progress since being her and is gradually putting on weight.  With admissions also comes discharges.  It’s never easy to say goodbye to a child but knowing that they are going to a better place is very comforting.  Last month we had a child adopted which was fantastic because adoption rates are decreasing in South Africa.  Also our eldest children are getting ready to leave over the next two months, with the first leaving tomorrow.  Amanda will be moving to a children’s village called ‘SOS’.  Here she will live in a house with 7 other children and have a housemother who lives with them permanently. This is such a good set up for her because it providers her with a more homely environment where she will be able to receive more one-to-one love and care.  A few of the others will also be following to SOS or other care home.  And for a lucky few, some are being reunited with their families.  Which is always an ideal situation.

As for Christmas travels, we leave Umtata on the 23^rd and head Cape Town bound.  We will stay there for 8 nights with around about 45 other Project Trust volunteers from South Africa, Namibia, Botswana and Swaziland.  It’s fair to say that I’m a little excited!!! I’m staying in a backpackers called Two Oceans which costs R85 a night (£7 a night!!!).  More money for partying J It’s on Long Street which is the ‘clubbing strip’ if you like of Cape Town.  Christmas day will be spent either having lunch at a nice restaurant with all the vols or having a Braai, then hitting the beach.  Kind of gutted I won’t be getting my mums massive Christmas dinner though!!  New years eve will also be spent here, and from what I’ve heard, Long Street just turns into one massive street party for the night… BUZZING!! So after lots of alcohol consumption and partying we will be departing on new years day – nursing a big hangover I’m sure – and we head for Wilderness on the Garden Route.  Wilderness is as at sounds, we will be in the middle of a national park surrounded by trees, rivers and beaches.  Time for us to relax and recover from the madness of Cape Town.  Next stop Plettenburg Bay, where I will be doing the world highest bungee jump (shh don’t tell my mum, she will FREAK!!)  At 216m high I will be jumping with just a rope to save me from plummeting to the rocks that await me below.  But so far I haven’t heard of any deaths so that’s a positive.  Last stop, Jefferys Bay.  Along the way I will be brushing up on my surfing and spending lot of time lying on the beach. In Jefferys we’re planning on sandboarding, it’s like snowboarding, but on sand.  I took to snowboarding pretty easy so I’m hoping I will with sandboarding.  Other plans are quad biking around a game reserve looking for the ‘African Big 5’, elephant encounters, shopping and drinking.  We will be heading home on 7^th January after a pretty packed 2 weeks off.  So yeah… the next month or so I am very much looking forward to and can’t wait to explore.  I just want to see everything!!!

Week 7

Written on 23/10/2012

An update on the last two half weeks.  Sorry I have been so rubbish at writing and posting blogs, I didn’t even realise how long it had been since my last post, but time is flying by here! Quicker than I even could have imagined.  Before I know it I’ll be back on the plane to the UK wishing I could do it all over again. 

Anywho the last 3 weeks have been pretty busy, with both the mamas and the kids keeping us on our toes.  Coffee Bay was lovely.  We spent most of it on the beach, swimming in the Indian Ocean and surfing.  I’m pretty much a pro surfer it has to be said ;) Last Saturday a church came to Bethany and organised a party for the children, they brought two massive bouncy castles, loads of food and cakes and one of those things you hit with a stick and all the sweets fall out (I know what it’s called but I have no idea how to spell it, so I’m saving myself the embarrassment! haha).  But the kids had the time of their lives, I’ve never seen so many beaming faces all at one time.  Some had never seen a bouncy castle before so it was amusing and adorable to watch them figure out why there was suddenly a big rest castle in their back garden!  After much messing around and jumping we stopped for lunch and songs.  There’s something about African gospel singing that I love, epically a room full of 50 children singing.  All in all it was such a fun day and the sun was shining (stupidly forgot to put sun cream on again, so my shoulders looked like two lobsters!).

Over the last 3 weeks I feel like I’ve bonded with the children lot more.  I love the way they all run up to me and ask for hugs and high-fives.  I love that some of them call me Mama.   I love getting them ready for bed and giving them a kiss goodnight.  I love that even though they’ve been through so much they are still able to show love and compassion.  I love that I am able to act like a child again and mess around all day with them.  I even love it when we’re on the school run and the children scream ‘LAKE’ at the top of their voices when we pass by it, even though we do everyday (it never gets old for them!)

Oh, some very exciting news, Aphililie took her first few steps today!!  I’ve been practicing with her for the past month or so and today she did it.  Although she ended up falling over many times trying, it was amazing to watch.  But the best thing to see was the expression on her face when she did it.  A moment I won’t be forgetting any time soon J 

The girls and I also went for out first proper Braai.  I have never seen so much meat in my life, it was awesome.  Don’t get wrong, I love a BBQ but there’s something about a Braai that is so much better!!

Other than that things have been pretty much routine around here.  Missing everyone at home a lot!!Xxx

Home

Written on 05/10/2012

I have now been in South Africa for over a month now.  Time has flown by.  It feels like yesterday I was standing in the airport with tears rolling down my face saying goodbye to my family and friends.  However I am totally settled in at Bethany Home now and it’s home.  Although the days can be long and very tiring, the children make it all worth it.  I have also been receiving letters from home, which has been so lovely.  It always makes my day to get a letter and my wall is filling up were I’m sticking them up.  If you want, please write to me, I would love to hear from anyone, as Internet is expensive so contact with home is minimal.  My address is:

Bethany Home, PO Box 25, Vulindlela Heights, Mthatha 5143, Eastern Cape, SOUTH AFRICA.

I mainly work in the nursery with the babies (0-18 months). I know you’re not meant to have favourites but I do have a ‘Bethany Baby’ who is coming home with me (SURPRISE Mum!!!). However I have grown attached to them all and it’s amazing to watch them grow and develop so quickly.  Yumkela started walking last week after much practicing with him, I am now struggling to keep up with him and he finds it hilarious to run away and hide in the nurse’s room.  Aphililie is also very close to walking, I found some walking frames to help her get used to using her legs.  Plus the kids in the day room love them, they play ‘bumper cars’ in them.

Tuesday was another hospital visit with the two year old who had been suffering from seizures.  We went to collect the results from his CT scan.  It was the first time I had done a hospital visit alone.  However there was a strike taking place so it was mayhem.  When we were sitting in the waiting in the room we heard singing from down the corridor getting louder and louder.  Before we knew it, the room was filled with over 500 hospital workers chanting, singing and dancing in cause of their strike.  I think all strikes should be like this because it was amazing, if I didn’t have a sleeping baby in my arms I would have probably joined!!  Haha, the thought of me trying to African dance…

Apart from the odd job the last two weeks have been pretty quite and routine.  However last night we went out for pizza with some other local volunteers from Germany.  One boy went to the toilet, when he came back to the table his jaw was dislocated.  For a moment everyone just stared at him and was stunned.  I broke the silence by saying “ermm I think he needs to go to the hospital!”  After many phone calls he was taken to a private hospital where they quickly put it back in place.  Apparently the crunching noise was something else.  On the bright side the pizza was to die for and as it was ‘all you can eat’, I think I over did it a bit.

We are off to Coffee Bay today for the weekend for a well-deserved break.  It will be nice to just lye on the beach and have a cocktail.  I think I might try some surfing and cliff jumping (I’ve got to have some sort of adrenaline rush!).  We’re staying in Coffee Shack backpackers, which is located right on the beach and backed by mountains and cliffs.

I think that’s about it for now, sorry it’s not the most exciting blog!! Xxx